I’m looking for an interested third party to whom I can outsource those annoying Mommy duties. You know, the ones you dread, like taking the wranglers to the dentist, dance class, soccer, and on and on. Could I hire some brave soul who will listen patiently to TWO kids at once practicing a violin and a cello for strings class?
Here’s one that I’d pay big bucks for someone to take over, cooking! That everyday thankless task where a Mom can spend one hour, or more preparing dinner, only to see scrunched up faces at the dinner table, indicating that the wranglers do not approve of the food. What would our parents have said if WE didn’t eat dinner?
Or how about this one? Getting the kids ready for school every morning? Oh joy, it’s a screaming match everyday. Channel Chick and I go round and round about what to wear, what to eat and what to pack for lunch. That would be a relief to outsource that morning nightmare!!
Digging through backpacks has never been one of my favorite Mom duties, in fact, it’s treacherous. Most of the time I wear latex gloves before I stick my hand into any zippered area. This would be a great chore to outsource to a HazMat Team, I know they could handle it.
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| This will be me while all of my distasteful chores are being done, ahhhh! |
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| Goodbye dears!!!! |
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| I will be tuning into Keith and tuning OUT the wranglers! |
Homework! There’s a task I could do without. Two fifth graders with math, science and social studies can be an all night affair, with a LOT of bitchin’! You got your math boxes, various tests and science projects, all outsourced! Poof!
So what about bedtime? Are there any companies who will tuck them in, threaten them and
KEEP them from sneaking down the stairs? Yes, I have one of those too! I adore outsourcing, it helps keep me sane. So now Mommies In Orbit can sit on the sofa and enjoy a glass of wine while MOST of my duties are taken care of. Put it on speed dial 1-888-UGO-AWAY!!
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