Have kids ever come with instructions? What about back in the Wild West days? Did the pioneers really have time while travelling across the plains in a covered wagon to read  “how to raise wranglers?” Maybe they held a nightly reading group around the campfire to discuss child-rearing, ya think? 

Do these dudes look like they had time to read?

How did they correct the little varmits when they did wrong? Did they put ’em on a bucking bronco until they had some sense? Make them sprint behind the wagons? Catch rattlesnakes? What worked for them?

I’m just asking, I’m looking for some sure-fire parenting tactics to get the tween, twin, wranglers to listen up. They don’t seem to hear much of what I say, and what they do hear, they twist it around. I’ve mentioned the “not listening zone” once before, but this is different. I get a lot of this,

Sheesh Mom, you didn’t tell me that!”
or “I know, I know, I’m doing my homework.”

Perhaps if I could adopt the glare that Wild Bill had, would they listen then?  He owned the, “I’m gonna kick your butt to the next county if you don’t listen up wranglers” kind of attitude.

Could it work for me, or would they just howl at me with some sort of hideous laughter?

Does Wild Bill look like he would take any crap from kids?

It couldn’t hurt to try. What will the neighbors think? Will they have me committed? Will anyone notice that I’m just rockin’ back and forth on the front porch waiting for the bus? Will my kids even get OFF the bus when they see me? If that’s what I gotta do, then I’m doing it. What would Wild Bill do? I think he would have a couple stiff shots of whiskey first, That’s it! I’ll let you know how it works.

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