I’m beginning to think that in order to make it through Thanksgiving with the wranglers, I may need some atomic batteries. They are commonly used for space missions. Since my life is comparable to a space mission, then it seems perfectly fitting that atomic batteries would give me…
I hear that brain clutter in our Mom community is on the rise. Or, as us astrophysicist-types like to say, orbital debris is clouding our ability to think clearly. At any given time we have millions of tiny scraps of debris floating about in our brain. I blame it mostly on my kids,…
Really Santa? Where are we headed with this? The Forever Lazy Lounger? Just when you thought your kids couldn’t get anymore lethargic, this appears just in time for the holidays. I can barely get the wranglers to roll out of bed, much less have them wrap themselves up…
A black hole is a part of space that is so dense that not even light cannot escape from the surface. And how does this remind me of my kids? Black holes are known to warp space, similar to how my kids have warped my brain. So if a black hole…
It’s the time of year again, November the birthday month. Boys want action parties and girls want sleepovers, my worst nightmare. I’ve already hinted to several veteran sleepover Moms that I’m willing to shell out big bucks for someone else to host this event, while I check into a nice hotel,…
I know, it’s a long title, but it’s so true. Has anyone noticed those droids in grocery stores, Target, perhaps the mall, who yack so incessantly on their “smart phones” that they have totally convinced themselves they are the only people in the building? And does this type of…
” Where did I leave those darned dentures anyway?”
I’ve been told that some radio stations are playing Christmas music, already? I don’t know about you, but I’m not ready to be humming Jingle Bells. And I’m certainly not prepared for the creepy Elf On The Shelf dude to make his appearance on my mantel. Halloween was just one week ago!…
Of course I’m ready for the huge rock! After spending an entire week with the wranglers as their only human target, authority figure in the home, I think I can take on the hurtling asteroid. I’m used to dealing with “potentially hazardous objects.” You may even know their names,…
This is just the kind of night where I’m inclined to run out the front door in my robe screaming, “Someone, please take the wranglers to a far away place!” They have broken my spirit with their constant bickering and bullshit. OK, sharing is good!You know the drill,…